How to Tell Your Spouse You Want a Separation or Divorce

10 tips to help you organize and prepare yourself for a difficult conversation: telling your spouse. One of the first questions I get from people who consult with me is “How do I tell my spouse?”  Even if you believe your spouse sees it coming (or should have...

Can We Still Be Friends (after Divorce)?

from Song by Todd Rundgren, 1978 If you’ve had enough birthdays, you may remember this 70’s song by Todd Rundgren. He poses a question that comes up at the end of relationships. Maybe, if we can still be friends, it will soften the blow, lessen the pain. A more...

3 Ways to Manage Kids’ Expenses after the Divorce

Certain mandatory shared children’s expenses are defined in the CA Income and Expense declaration which include: child care for job training and/or work, medical care, special educational needs, and travel related to visitation. But what about other expenses such as extracurricular sports, private school, orthodontia, tutors, birthday parties, even haircuts?

How to Stop Fighting in Front of Your Kids

(Beyond Buttoning Your Lips!) Hold a “Commitment Ceremony” Before you can implement any of the following ideas, you need to have a commitment from your ex (or soon to be ex) that you will both do everything possible to stop fighting in front of the kids. Write it down...