What story do you want your kids to share about your divorce when they are grown? The decisions and actions you take now, shape their future narratives. Nesting offers your children the chance to create a story of a healthy and amicable separation or divorce.
What I say to the first noted potential clients is that I, as a neutral financial professional, promise them they will know everything financially related to their divorce prior to any decision making. It is my job to lay out all the assets and debts and income and expenses in simple and understandable form to both clients and any mediator or attorneys. It is also my job to educate my clients about taxes, tax filing status, health and life insurance, Social Security, pension values, and the consequences of dividing assets that have tax related issues.
Filing a petition for dissolution of marriage (divorce) simply opens a file at the courthouse and gives you a file number to use in the future. Nothing else will ever happen if no one files anything further. In fact in many counties, the court is obligated to close the case if no one files anything else within a 3-5-year period.
My earlier blog (“Making Sense of Those Legal Forms” posted February 1, 2021) discussed the forms that are needed to begin the process for divorce. This article is written to explain the forms that must be submitted to the court in order to complete the process of obtaining your divorce.
A vaccine and effective treatment options were eventually discovered for COVID-19. There is also a “vaccine” and effective treatment remedies available for the “virus” related to divorce conflict and its heavy burden on the children in the family: Collaborative Divorce.
Imagine a child learning that their parents are divorcing in a way that is filled with empathy and hope for the future. No matter how hard the change in lifestyle will be for your children, you as their parents hold the key to their adjustment during and after divorce.
You have full support. Unlike in mediation, you have a lot of support and guidance throughout your Collaborative Divorce. A mediator is neutral, so he/she cannot advise you or advocate for either of you. The mediator should educate you about the law and can facilitate the conversation between you and your partner, but cannot stop you from making an uninformed or unwise decision. If you like the idea of mediation but feel that you would benefit from having your own lawyer’s guidance and support, Collaborative Divorce is the process to consider.
Remember when you had a great relationship and enough hopes for the future to marry? These can be reasons not to divorce, along with concerns about children’s welfare and resilience and relationships with your spouse’s family and other ways you are entwined that are valuable to you. Discernment Counseling is a one to five session process of gaining clarity and confidence in your decision along with gaining understanding of how you and your spouse got to the point that divorce is an option.
Divorce is a difficult and emotional process for both the spouses and the children involved. When parents decide to separate, it is important for them to recognize the impact it can have on their children, and to make an effort to support their relationship with the other parent.
The time leading up to your wedding will be filled with love, excitement, and optimism. Whether you’ll be keeping things sweet and simple or going big with the ceremony and celebration, I hope you enjoy the fun experience of planning your special day. So, what role do prenuptial agreements play in this exciting time? Some engaged couples are under the impression that prenuptial agreements lead to an admission that they’ll end up getting divorced. Nothing could be further from the truth.
When someone is just beginning to think about a divorce, there can be so much fear about what is going to happen. A good way to get off on the right foot in your divorce is to meet with a Collaborative Divorce Navigator.
Collaborative Practice California, the umbrella group for all of California’s Collaborative Practice Groups, is offering California residents FREE 30-minute divorce consultations provided by volunteer attorneys, mental health professionals, and divorce financial specialists. These consultations are like any intake meeting with a prospective client.
In summary as addressed above, most individuals select “irreconcilable differences” as the reason for their divorce in California because it is the easiest to prove and does not require expert testimony about the other person’s mental capacity.
About six months after you met, you agreed it was time to meet each other’s children. You know it is not easy for children to allow a new adult into their lives so you want to be as careful as possible. You expect your ex-husband will not take it well that you are in a new relationship, however, you know it is better to tell him before you introduce the children to your new partner.
The crisis of divorce brings many unexpected losses. One of the most painful is when your children blame you for the divorce. Kids are caught in a trap—whom to blame, who needs loyalty, who is most vulnerable. You can ease the burden for them.
Prospective clients often call me to say they have just been told that their spouse wants a divorce, they are frightened and have no idea where to start. I usually suggest they attend a free online Divorce Options Workshop.
When something is on your mind, find a time to discuss it calmly, with the goal of a constructive, problem-solving conversation. Long-term relationships’ disagreements look different because they are often sprinkled with humor and affection. This is one of the keys to a long-term happy relationship.
Remember that the right amount of child support, is not always what a computer program comes up with. The better description might be the amount that will meet the reasonable needs of your children without causing significant detriment to the person paying or receiving it.
I am often asked questions like “Do I have to go back to work after our divorce when we agreed I would I care for our children?”
When you stay open to the possibility that you do not necessarily know what your partner will say or do and you monitor your assumptions about them, you may be able to maintain a channel of communication that is less fraught with argument and disappointment. You may still not like what he or she is wanting, but you will at least not like it from the standpoint of knowing that it is what they are actually want.